Today, the fat lady sings.

I don't even know how to say this, I feel like I just lost a limb or something.  Today, we are officially civilians.  I could never have predicted how emotion I would be over leaving the Army.  I've been crying for days, yet I cannot put into words why this is so upsetting.  I've been trying to figure out what to write about this for days and I just have no words.  I really wish I could explain my emotions right now but nothing I type seems to make sense or convey exactly how I'm feeling.

Once again, the lyrics of my all time favorite song seem to be the only words I have.

"It's something unpredictable, but in the end is right,

I hope you had the time of your life."

It's So Hard....

...To Say Goodbye. Any Boys II Men fans? I've noticed I do this a lot with my posts, use song lyrics as titles...if you've ever met my husband, you'll understand where it comes from. If he hears anything that is some part of a song or similar to a song lyric he knows, he's going to sing it.  Doesn't matter the setting, he's singing.  Sometimes it's cute and other times it annoys the crap out of me, either way it's rubbed off on me!  I digress.

I've said a lot of goodbyes over the past few weeks.

Kumiko, my friend and student.

 Kyoko, my volunteer buddy.

Marissa, my favorite spin instructor.

Preston, my great friend and physics lab partner from college.

Our great friends, "the Robs" (Rob & Robert).

Misae, one of my lovely students.

Today was by far the hardest though.  Our best friends left the island today, 9 days before us.  I'm so grateful we are leaving soon because looking out our back window and seeing their empty house makes me incredibly sad.  One of our neighbors planned a surprise going away BBQ for them earlier this week and it was the perfect night.  Our closest friends all made it our for one last night together.

The guys.

The ladies + adorable baby Sawyer!

These children all adore my husband (the feeling is mutual) and we've had a great time getting to know them and watch them grow over the past few years.  (Only 2 of them belong to our friends who left today)

Kristin has been my rock, my confidant, my therapist, my role model and my best friend for the past 3 years.  I thank God everyday that he placed our families together here at the same time, in houses just across the lawn.  I know that we'll be life long friends.  Both of our families (and our husband's) are from the same general area so I know we'll see each other again over the years when we're in town visiting our families and I'm certain we'll plan trips to visit them at their new home and vice versa.

Kristin, I know you'll read this so I just want to say thank you for being my best friend.  I'll miss you every day until I see you (and your boys) again!

PS.  "Oh boy!"

Go time!

We officially have orders.  In less than 2 months I will be living in San Diego settling into civilian (my husband will stay in the Reserves) life.  It's been crazy up to this point and now that we have that magic piece of paper in our hands it's only going to get crazier!

While we were living in Japan, we stored our POV car at my in-law's and now we're getting some run around on whether the Army will pay to ship it to Cali or not (one place says yes, the other says no because we didn't store it in a commercial facility).

We wanted to buy a condo in SD but now we're being told that Jason's post 9/11 G.I. Bill BAH doesn't count as income so we won't be approved for a loan since that will be about half of our income for the next three years.

I'm working on applying for jobs, something I haven't done in 8 years!  Luckily we have a wonderful volunteer here in our transition office that has helped me make my resume top notch so I'm feeling more confident in selling myself.

We've started to say our goodbyes.  Tonight we're having friends over for dinner.  One of them is a teacher and he will be going back to the States for the summer and won't return until after we leave.  Tomorrow my friend, Preston, who I went to college with and is stationed at a near by Navy base is coming over for dinner and some Settlers because he leaves for a deployment shortly and also will not return until after we've left for SD.

So many chapters here are starting to come to a close.

I received an award the other day for the 18+ months I served as the FRG leader.  I was surprised and beyond grateful.  I, for the most part, enjoyed my time in the position.  I wish I had been able to encourage more participation in and enthusiasm for some of the events but overall I think it was a very successful run.

Today we attended a ceremony for this adorable little pre-k grad.  It's hard to believe the first time we met him he was still in diapers and didn't speak a single word.  We've known him over half of his life and we absolutely adore his sweet little heart and have loved watching him grow and develop into a charming kindergartner! (his parents and his brother are pretty awesome too!)

This transition period is always the hardest for me.  As much as I want to stay in Japan, I'm ready to have my stuff packed and be on our way to what lies ahead.  I hate the limbo phase.  Here's praying it passes quickly (and smoothly)!

238 Army Birthday Celebration

On Saturday we celebrated the Army's birthday at Camp Zama.  Military balls seem to be one of those things that people either love or hate.  Since this was only my 2nd ball, I am still one of those people who love them, I like to play dress up.  Since all of favorite people here were attending this ball, I loved this one even more.  It was a tad stressful trying to find a dress over here but I found  an unbeatable deal on one that was so far out of my comfort zone and went with it.  I didn't love it but I got a lot of compliments and since it was dirt cheap ($45) I consider it a win!

With my love.

Prom pose with our favorites!

This is our main crew here at Zama.  We love these people and cannot get enough of them!

Apparently we didn't say "fun picture" loud enough for everyone to hear it.  I love that we're all so Japanized that "fun picture" now translates to peace signs.

Our men...we are some very lucky ladies!

The ladies

With some of our awesome neighbors.

I love these ladies!

This woman.  I cannot say enough about her.  She is my rock here and I don't know what I'm going to do without my daily therapy sessions on her couch.  Thankfully we are both leaving with in a week of each other so we're going through this whole PCS process together.  She is a great friend and a wonderful role model.  I am certain will be a part of my life forever!

The food was blah and the room was sauna hot so we didn't stay long but we still had a great night with great friends.  I'm so happy we had this time together before we PCS in 2 months (EEEK!!!)

Quick like a Band-aid!

We're getting out of the Army!

Phew, there, I said it!  My secret is out of the closet and now I can let everyone in on what that means!  This is something Jason and I have been discussing for 5 years now.  We love being a part of the military and the crazy lifestyle that comes with that.  Jason has had a great career with the Army and we'd really rather not leave but in order for Jason to get what he wants out of live, it's time for a change and the only way to do that is leave the Army...for now.  He wants to be a nurse so he's going to leave active duty for 3 years to complete some pre-reqs then a two-year accelerate nursing degree.  After that our plan, as of right now, is to get back into the Army in the Nursing Corps.  Obviously things are going to change, a lot, over the next 3 years so that plan could change, but for now, that's our plan.

For the first time ever in our marriage we have the opportunity to live anywhere we want to.  ANYWHERE!  Much to our family & friends disdain, we did not choose our hometown.  After months and months and many flip-flops, we have decided to move to SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA!  I never in my life thought I'd be a Cali girl but I absolutely fell in love the few times I visited and we're excited for our next adventure.  Obviously it is bittersweet for me as Japan has truly become my home but that's another post for another day.

I'm looking forward to going back to work (now you all know why I decided to go back to school all of the sudden) but I'm nervous about finding a job.  I haven't worked in 6 years so I hope my volunteer work translates well into the real world!

I have so much to say about this but I'm trying not to ramble too much.  Y'all are going to hear read plenty about this over the next few months as things unfold.  For now we're trying to make it through the last few months of my school and my husbands job as a company commander.  We have a much needed and well deserved vacation to Okinawa planned to celebrate when these two things end and that is the light at the end of my tunnel right now.  After that vacation it will be crunch time and things will be happening very quickly.

This week it's about to get real as we attend some "getting out of the Army" classes.  Please pray for me/us.  Some may not feel as I do but I'm very sad to leave this world behind us (for now, I'm really holding onto "for now").

PCS season

As a military spouse, you learned to make friends quickly each time you PCS.  You also learn that those friends will just as quickly be ripped away and it's usually way more painful than ripping off a Band-Aid!  It's part of the territory.  You deal with it.  It's just something we do.   I made it almost all the way through the 2012 PCS season without saying a single "see you later".  That changed yesterday.  Yesterday I dropped some of our very best friends off at the train station for the last time.

The silver lining to this see you later is that right now, I'm on my way to pick up these two awesome people from the airport and welcome them to Camp Zama!

The Army really is a small world.  We're so grateful to spend our last 8-10 months in Japan with these two!

It's hard to believe that next PCS season we will be the ones leaving...I cannot even let myself think about that right now!

great experience

The Army runs a pretty neat program here at Camp Zama where every quarter 10 or so Japanese soldiers are selected to come live at Camp Zama for 2-3 months.  I don't know the specific requirements but from what I hear it is pretty selective and the Japanese soldier has to speak some level of English.  Each Japanese co-op is matched with an American Soldier whom they shadow while they are here.  They also attend training and meetings here.  The co-ops {Japanese soldier} and their sponsors {American soldier} attend social events and are encouraged to socialize outside of official functions.

Last month, Jason was approached and asked if he would like to sponsor a co-op this quarter.  Even though he is incredibly busy as the company commander, the specific co-op they wanted to match him with was an Engineer officer and since there are so few of those here at Zama, Jason agreed.  At first I thought he was crazy to say yes {our time together is limited as is} but knowing my husband, I can't say I was surprised.  Now that we're 3 weeks into the program, I am so glad that Jason agreed to do this.  Jason's co-op, Hama, is great.  Jason was blessed with a great co-op!

One day last week, while my mom was here, Jason called me around 1730 and told me that he had invited his co-op and 2 of the other co-ops {Taku & Nita} to dinner.  At our house.  In an hour.  With my mom's help, we were able to have the house clean and a tradition American BBQ on the table in time.  Since then we've had dinner with Hama once more and I've taken the 3 of them to the commissary which was a ton of fun.  It was so interesting to see someone experience an American grocery store for the 1st time.  For the most part our grocery stores are very similar but there are some differences.  Like the bulk isle in an American grocery store.  1 gallon jugs of barbecue sauce don't exist in Japan {that I know of}.  They also don't sell cans of Coke by the case like we do.  The only way I've ever seen Coke for sale in a Japanese grocery store is by the liter.

Tonight, Hama {and the guys} came over to our house and cooked a traditional Japanese meal using ingredients that are famous in his hometown

the meal was absolutely delicious!

 I am so grateful to Hama for cooking for us and sharing this dish with us.  

Jason adding another thing to his schedule is so worth it to get to know these guys 

{Taku, Hama, Nika, Jason}

I'm really bummed that I will be spending 5 of the weeks that they are here in the US.  I have loved the time we have spent with these guys and I wish I could be here for more time with them.  My life is better because of this experience!

If any of you who are reading this ever find yourself at Camp Zama and are ever offered the opportunity to participate in this program, I say go for it! {or any other international base that may have a similar program} Yes it is more work for the soldier but everyone involved benefits tremendously {IMO}.

Treading water

PHEW!  I feel like I have been treading water for the past 3 months and someone finally threw me a life preserver.  I'm well aware that my life has been crazy because I chose it to be, and I wouldn't trade it for the world, but man is it nice to relax a bit!

Since my last post, I spent 6 days in Ofunato where I did some more gutting, laid some bricks at a park, distributed winter items to families in temporary housing and learned how to play ground golf, a game many elderly Japanese play that is very similar to putt-putt.  Sadly, that trip was my last to Ofunato, at least for now.  I would like to return in the spring to volunteer some more and if that's not possible, I hope to visit again as a tourist some time before we leave.

I also spent 3 days at a photography workshop in Yokohama.  I really had no idea what I was getting myself into when I signed up for PhotoFest Japan 2011, I just hoped to learn a few things about my camera and a thing or two about photography in general.  Any expectations I had were far exceeded!  10 minutes into day 1, class 1, I learned how to do something on my camera that I didn't think was possible and it just kept getting better from there. Basically, there were 3 professionals that each taught a different class on a different topic every hour.  Participants were free to attend which ever class we were interested in.  We also went on a few different outings and were able to drill the pro's with tons of questions.  I learned a ton, met some great people and got to work with a few models {a 1st for me...unless you count ones that are related to me}

At the end of the weekend, we had a "contest" among the participants.  While none of my photos were chosen as favorites by my peers, one {we were only about to submit 2 each} of my photos was selected by the pro's as an honorable mention and what they think is way more important.


Here is that photo

and a few others from the weekend

The most important thing that happened since my last blog post however, was this

Hubby {far left} finally got his company command!!!  It's been quite a roller coaster getting to this point but it's here and we're excited for this part of our journey here in Japan!  I'm sure there will be many vague, ranting posts to come regarding this topic =}

Military Life

Earlier this week, I read chapter 30 of the Army Wife Handbook {it was given to me as a gift, I figured I might as well read part of it}.  Today I attended a 6 hour class at ACS.  Anyone want to take a guess what is about to happen?!?!?  

Almost 2 years after my husband graduated from CCC {Captains Career Course}, it's almost time for him to take company command.  In less than 2 weeks, I will be the proud wife of the ICORP FWD HHC company commander.  Along with his new job title comes the responsibility of maintaining the company FRG {Family Readiness Group}.  What that really means is, since no spouse has stepped up to lead said group {it's usually led by a spouse of someone in the unit under the supervision of the CC}, that it falls on Jason's plate.  This leaves me with 2 options.  1. Let him do it which in turn means more work for him which leads to less time to spend with me.  or 2. Step up and volunteer to lead the group myself.  Since I actually enjoy spending time with my husband, I have chosen option 2.  The only problem with this is that until recently, I have never even attended an FRG meeting {we've been through a string of unusual units/circumstances}.  I basically have NO clue what I'm doing but if it makes my husbands life easier, I'm going to do my best to figure it out!  I pray that a more experienced wife steps up and offers to help me but for now I'm trying to suck up as much information as possible. {Any advice/resources/thoughts/comments/experiences would be appreciated}

Just when I thought my schedule was going to calm down a bit, I've realized it's probably going to do quite the opposite.  I picked up an English teaching gig as a sub for one of my friends, at least once a month.  PWOC has started back up again.  I was elected secretary of the photography club on base. {I wasn't even around for that one, I received an email the morning after the meeting I missed saying "Congratulations!...." lol}.  The spouses group here has kicked off a new year.  I'm still teaching my regular students.  I started taking Japanese lessons. My volunteer projects.  This blog.  Holiday season.  Now the role of FRG leader?!?!  Thank God for my Lilly planner or I might just lose my head!  I really need to schedule in time to go to the gym too before the pounds creep up on me.  I wanted to start taking some classes and get to work on finishing my undergrad degree but that is going to have to wait until I see exactly how much time these commitments are going to take up.

I have always thought my time management skills were above par but I guess we are going to find out here in the next couple months!

And because I can't post without a photo, here is a shot of me and some of the awesome girls I met through All Hands hanging out in Tokyo

Military Spouse Appreciation Day

Thank you Military Spouses for all you do to support your spouse who fights for my freedom!

Military Life, A to Z

So I'm a little late, but I was busy spending a few days at Ft Campbell with my brother-in-law and his girlfriend before he left for his 1st deployment

I was only supposed to be there for about 36 hours but thanks to mother nature, his flight got cancelled and we got to spend an extra day with him before we said goodbye for real =(

Yep, that's right, I was in Nashville when the tornado's hit that area on Monday.  The power went out at the airport and the rain and wind was crazy.  I have officially survived my 2nd natural disaster in less than a month!

Back to the original point of this post

A lot of ladies posted multiple words for each letter, but I kept it to one.  Here's my list:

Airborne

Boots

Command

Deployment

Engineer

Flexible

General

Hoorah

Infiltrate

Jumpmaster

Kevlar

LZ (Landing Zone)

Mission

NVG (Night Vision Goggles)

Orders

Promotion

Qualify

Rank

Salute

Tanks

Uniforms

Voluntary

Weapons

XO (Executive Officer)

Yellow ribbons

Zama

let's talk about PARKING in Japan

It only took me about 2.5 months to figure this one out...

1st, you find an empty spot

and back in (if you don't know how to back into a parking spot, you will learn real fast once you get here...luckily I almost always backed in to spots in the States, and now that we have a little match box car, it's a breeze for me!)

 next this little bar pops up (it is delayed about 10 minutes...that took me a while to figure out!) to keep you from driving away

when you're ready to leave, you push the button that matches your spot number

and then the screen tells you how much you owe (it's hard to tell, but today I paid 100 Yen, or about $1.25 to park) and you put your coins into the slot (some take bills but this one does not)

and the bar drops down

 and you drive away, happy that you've conquered another new challenge while living in a foreign country!

I still cannot believe we are so blessed to be living here.  Every day is a new challenge adventure that I am eternally grateful for!  Many of my military followers have expressed to me that they are jealous of this opportunity (it is a VERY rare opportunity for someone in the Army, most of the military here are Air Force, Navy and Marines) and I thought I'd let everyone know that we did not get this assignment because my husband is an officer or by luck.  In 2007 my husband VOLUNTEERED to go to war so that when he returned and finished some required training, he could choose his our next duty station.  He had always dreamed that it would be Japan, but we honestly thought it would be partially his choice and partially the Army's choice (he was "guaranteed" one of his top 3 choices), but the Army held up their end of the deal.  When Jason went in to meet with his branch manager after he finished school, he told the guy he wanted Japan and the guy's response was, "you volunteered for a deployment to be able to choose your duty station.  we'll make it happen" and they did!  That's how we ended up here.  I'm so lucky to have such an amazingly brave husband!